Jag Yggdrasil (jagyggdrasil) wrote,
Jag Yggdrasil
jagyggdrasil

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Satin Spar Selenite / Satin Spar Gypsum / The Lonely Crystalline Realm



I've admittedly been sulking.....about lately.......(*blushes*)....... . I've just....(also) been........*sad* ~~~~~.............. . Yearning......to crawl / hide under........a big rock..............type of sad....... . It's been fun ~~~ really ~~; it's not 'depression'........, and it's *such* an educational contrast to the unbridled happiness ~~~ which I previously knew / identified...........myself by........... . Well......, an event took place.........today....... . I was walking toward the riverfront pier.........area......which is near my lair........ . I needed some air........after my discovery at 'something' 'called' the' 'labyrinth' 'of' 'death' (more on that.......later). I carried a Petalite gemstone.........and an Apophyllite gemstone..........on my person, holding them in my hands.......... . As I walked..., an *INTENSE* series of sensations....came over me. It was like *burning* *matches* (!!!!!) being put to my skin............ . My brow, my back, my collar, my arms, *BURNED* with pain....... . Glancing over myself..., I checked to make sure that I was not 'covered' 'in' 'wasps'............ . I tried to utilize *discipline*, and not 'make' 'a' 'scene'...... . I kept walking, surmising that my *gemstones* interacting with *sunlight*............caused the event. I figured that the sensations would pass with time, and *somehow*.......they did.... . Eventually I reached my destination, a gem....shop........ . I saw *this* gemstone:

IMG_20140424_132559 .

Picking up the gemstone........., I was like "????". It felt *soft*........ . It had a hauntingly soft and complex........energy to it........... . I actually *went* *red*, blushing, because the gemstone ~~~ reminded me of (!!?!) feminine.......(!!!) energy........(!!!????!!!) so...... . I felt confused (!!!) as my body responded (!!!!) to the energy.......in an *eerie* way...........(*feels my face burning*)...... . Suddenly, a *wave* of dizziness (!!!!) came over me ~~~~~........... . I felt the sides of my head..., *THROB*........, and something like a *BOLT* of rainbow colored energy ~~~~...............*crackled* from a side of my head (organ) toward the other!!!!! After that bolt....., a neurological area (!!!) behind my eyes.........seemingly (!!) jolted awake / operational......... . An eerie...wind.......swirled.....about my arms.........and face........ . I then *saw* it......., *felt* it......... . Occupying *the* *same* *space* as the riverfront area (!!!!), was a *CRYSTALLINE* *WORLD*!!!!! *A* *LONELY* *WORLD*!!!!!! It...apparently.....is the world which I *pass* *through*.................whenever I walk about / around this thoughtform zone................ . There was *huge*.....crystalline clusters *all* *around*, and a pervading........feeling of *sadness* ~~~~~~~............ . I stood...., *disoriented*.......... . I perceived a pair of *drastically* varying locations.........*SIMULTANEOUSLY*. It was..., metaphorically speaking.........., akin to what would happen.....if you perceived yourself riding in a jostling vehicle......., whilst yet you also........perceived yourself stationary in an underwater environment..... . It was as if I was *phasing* (!!!!!!)........., and my *senses* were *confused*!!! The crystalline zone was *FULL* of otherwordly and haunting energies.........., and there was (!!!!) *NO* 'humans'.............!!!!! I was in *ecstasy* (!!!) to actually experience ~~~ the place which I had sought for so long............ . I noted suddenly noted 'motion' 'at' my left area......, the area of my body that was still to "the riverfront" / this place................; I felt *TERROR*, I felt *SPOOKED*.......... . Deep inside......, I wanted to *scream* in agony..........as I realized that I was still noting 'North' 'Carolina'................(to *some* extent). I tried keep calm, do what I had to to procure the gemstone........, and seek someplace quiet......... . Upon leaving the shop........., I went to the river's edge.......... . I meditated....with the *very* brightly shining Satin Spar Selenite column..... . I was *spooked* though as I witnessed '3' 'townies'....'approach'.......... . I noted 'suspicious' 'glances'....'and' 'compliments'....'at' my gems............. . I noted 'questions'.........(*facepalms*)....... . I tried to be courteous........(although, due to the prior event....., I momentarily had motor control issues with my speaking (!!!!!).......). I headed back.........to my lair, spooked.........after noting 'the' 'townies'' 'behavior'...... '/' 'questions'................. .

That crystalline zone (*exhales in feelings of guilt and confusion*) was *shockingly* identical to the motif / vibe / feel (!!!!!) of Sailor Moon.....(!!!!) (*feels my nails glow in shock*)........... .



If I soon awake to that place......, as Sailor Moon......no 'less'....., I'm going to be throwing up........(*blushes red*)...........for a *very* long time........... . I mean....., I'm so confused.................... . I *love* trying to help, protect, and nurture..........the innocent...........; I just do not know how I could *not* 'be' 'a' 'dude'.................. . (*Shakes my head*). I don't know if I am ever meant to accept "myself".......... . However, because my life purpose is seeing to the wellbeing of others........, I can just focus on that ^_^. Yea......... . I'll give all I have, all my efforts........., to awaken as / continue to be (!!!!) / *survive* *as* Sailor Moon.............; however, it *really* *is* about / for.....what I can try do for others......... . Yea, that's (too) because I am *absolutely* *confused* about myself............ .
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