Jag Yggdrasil (jagyggdrasil) wrote,
Jag Yggdrasil

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Some Things Never Change

Just a heads up about Saturday. So, after my big decision for Code Blue, looks like I noted "sour grapes" at my life plans. I witnessed a nasty letter at my mailbox. It isn't difficult to understand why it happened.

(Maybe it was or was also about my rethinking the dragonoid issue (*feels a caress to my left knee*), but my point remains).

Mankind will never support goals. Looks like my deep held hunch to never trust the words of a Caucasian were proven....... . The SSI director lied after taking the paperwork around Nov 20th. Any upcoming SSI and Medicaid cut also means noting upcoming cardiologist appointments cut. Lol. Figures I would note the enemy get spiteful at my decision. I wanted this to be a pretty, peaceful, and relaxed period of life, but yet again I note the savages acting like savages. That brings me to another reason (*gulps with hope*) why Code Blue presents an ultimate opportunity.... . For an initial time in over III decades, maybe I can live a day without a "dangerous deadline" or "homelessness threat" dangling at my head......like "The Sword Of Damocles".


Kayfabe seems broken. Even with grave heart issues, I am not expecting SSI to continue. And I must admit.......such doesn't even matter to me after my decision.

I've witnessed homelessness before, and now I can just burn all my gear in a bonfire if need be. Not only that, but my heart is just holding on. I'd collapse within my initial week of camling and hiking in the wilderness. I can not take the letter nor SSI seriously. Tis just a middle finger style diss at this era where I embark on a new journey.

Too, I can only consider this a solemn reminder, and even affirmation, that unless I have that concluding Code Blue event, I'll always note mankind tearing out at my throat, whether literally or figuratively. That, on account of who I am and what I can do.

Yea, I'm so tired at the cycle of terrorism and bullying, I do not even know if I can get upset this time. Whether it is of a level of "elementary school project due or else" 1980s threats, or 2016 SSI threats, terrorism is terrorism, and I am so tired at it.

'Twill truly be a pleasure to not have to witness the horde anymore, that, and the greatest blessing possible.
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